Sharks Won't Bite

"You should go on Shark Tank"! 

When people hear about Majamas and how I started this company, they relate my tale to one they've heard on that show. 

My response? "None of those sharks would ever bite at my business." We believe in making our garments the right way, not the cheapest way and for the most part, investors care more about big margins than the human cost of doing business.

Lessons Learned the Hard Way

People assume that when something is made in the USA, it's made in bright, beautiful shops and all the employees are happy and paid well. Unfortunately, this isn't always the case.

Twelve years ago, I was working with a contractor who assured me her shop was clean and well run, but when I went to inspect it, I found a complete mess. Bundles of junk and un-sewn goods were everywhere and the room was dark and hot. The workers were sweating (literally a sweat shop) and no one was happy. 

I realized that even though I thought I was doing the right thing by sewing in a U.S.A.  shop, supporting this woman's business was wrong. She didn't care about her employees and if she didn't care about the people she spent most her time with, she wouldn't care about my work. 

Our sewers work in clean and well-lit shops

I immediately pulled my production from this shop. Cut fabric, thread, trims and half-sewn garments. Overwhelmed and awkwardly lugging these armfuls to a rental car, I stumbled and watched half of them fall to the ground. As I stood looking at my production clumped in a pile on a dirty, city street, a man approached me and asked if I could use some help. Through tears, I answered, "Yes, thank you!" and as we walked to the car, he told me he had a sewing shop up the block. Through all this chaos, I had a stroke of luck; this man is now one of our most treasured contractors and his work is not only beautiful, but his shop is too.

He runs a family business. His brother, sister and mother all work with him and their employees work in a clean, well lit environment. They are paid a fair, living wage and their work shows it.  They are respected by their employer and in return, they respect him. 

Running your own business is a continuous "learning experience". No one told me to inspect a shop before contracting with it, but that day I learned to never hire a contractor without seeing their business first.

Majamas on Shark Tank? 

Not going to happen unless I'm one of the Sharks on the panel. Then, I would be the one investing in those fellow businesses doing things the right way, not the cheapest way. I'd insist the contractors take good care of their employees by paying fair wages and giving them clean, bright working conditions.   

Let's face it, most capitalists are greedy and only care about the money they can make, but at Majamas, we care about everyone involved in our business. It's the right way to operate and as a consumer, we all need to demand our products are made this way.  

Being Present

As I sit in my new office at 2140 W. Fulton, I breathe a big sigh of relief.  We are finally feeling settled into our new space and I am grateful we got thru these past 10 months.  Moving is tough and this move was one of the hardest steps to take in the 16 years we've been doing business.  We not only moved our business but we launched our new baby line, Shirley & Victor.  These two phases combined nearly made me crazy.  I'm not just saying "crazy" lightly.  I really lost my mind.

Russell and I work out a lot.  He was an elite, competitive swimmer and water polo player and he continues to swim Masters 3-4 times per week.  I was also a competitive swimmer and former triathlete.  When business gets tough, we tend to run together and discuss our challenges of the day.  One chilly February morning, I stopped right in the middle of our run and broke down in tears.  Not something I do often and definitely not something Russell expected to have to deal with that day.  I was exhausted from lack of sleep and so overwhelmed with stress, I completely lost it. 

Josie, happy to be in the new space

Years ago I walked into a doctor's office and saw the words, "Constant Stress is a Killer" written on the wall.  I can tell you first hand, this is true.  So how did I muster thru one of the most difficult times in my career?  I began to meditate.  I read Dan Harris' book, 10% Happier and started adopting some of his meditation techniques.  Not only did I start to sleep a little better but I was able to focus on the tasks at hand.  The first thing I did was to practice trying to be completely present.  For just 5 minutes each day, I forced myself to become 100% present in whatever I was doing.  I stopped the noise in my brain and really forced myself to listen to the person speaking to me or focusing 100% on whatever I was doing.  Every morning after working out I would lay on my yoga mat and just be present.  I started doing this for five minutes each day and before I knew it, I was meditating for 30 minutes.  Each night before going to bed, I drank a cup of "bedtime" tea, turned off the news and sat quietly, listening to my breath going in and out.  I am convinced without meditation, I would have been put on medication causing a slew of other complications I know I was not up to dealing with.

I'd like to say I no longer have the stress I had a few months ago and although it's gotten much better, I have daily challenges, just like everybody else.  I still have days when I can't settle my mind and meditating seems impossible, but I have learned how to cope with this.  I simply acknowledge my thoughts and then allow myself to let them go for at least 5 minutes each day. I force myself to breathe deeply and listen only to my breath. I recommend this for everyone, regardless of whether or not you think you're stressed. Not only will you begin to feel better, but you will find yourself enjoying life a lot more.  So be calm, be happy and be present!

Our new showroom, where buyers and customers can shop

                         

MOVING ON

My oldest daughter's departure to college last fall woke me up.  How did my little baby become old enough to move out and how did I get old enough to have a daughter old enough to leave home?

Don't worry, I won't bore you with all the details of my life, but these last six months have had me taking inventory. In my twenties I swore I would be vigilant and live each day with meaning.  My thirties were filled with new babies and launching my business.  These past few months I've been mourning the passage of time, but today, I feel motivated to be vigilant once again and to make the best of each day.  So, change is upon us! 

When Russell and I started Majamas, we quit our steady jobs, mortgaged the house and put all we had into it.  We eventually opened a store attached to our office in the Oak Park Arts District and it has been operating since 2004.  We are located next to the Buzz Café and rent the building owned by Laura and Andrew.  They have been terrific landlords and their business has definitely contributed to the success of ours.  We have had some wonderful neighbors in the OPAD like Pamela Penney, Val's Halla, Lisa Nordstrom, Liz Gaylord, Nancy and Bill Creighton and so many more.  

I always knew this day would come.  Nothing stays the same and just as my daughter has grown up and moved away, so must Majamas Boutique.  It's time for us to take another leap and implement the next phase of our business and in doing this, we have to move into a larger space.  Big buildings are hard to find in Oak Park and even though the Oak Park Development has been terrific in trying to help us find a bigger space, we just can't seem to find the right one.  So, we are heading to the city where our new space will allow us to have fashion shows, parties for our clients and even monthly sales we hope you'll attend.  We will still have our online retail sites (see addresses below) and a full showroom in our new space.  We intend to continue stocking other lines we love like Kickee Pants, Jelly Cat toys, Zutano and our new baby line Shirley & Victor so you can still give the most unique gift to any new momma and baby.  In addition, we will be expanding our Eliseo line designed for all women seeking beautiful clothes and of course, our awesome bras are available on our site and in the River Forest Whole Foods store.  We will be closer to our contractors who sew our lines and will remain committed to keeping everything made right here in the USA.

We will miss working in Oak Park, but Russell and I will continue to reside here.  Thank you to all our wonderful and loyal customers these past 11 years.  It has been a pleasure working with each and every one of you!  We have learned a lot from our clients and without your input and loyalty we would never have made it to this next step.  Stay connected with us on Facebook, follow us on Twitter and Instagram your looks to us.  Please don't lose touch Oak Parkers!

Find us at the following web sites:
www.majamas.com
www.majamasboutique.com
www.shirleyandvictor.com
www.eliseofashion.com

Or email us at:
germaine@majamas.com
russell@majamas.com

Who are Shirley & Victor?

After having four children with names like James, Jean, Christopher and Carol, my mom decided to try something different.  So she named me after her mother, Germaine.  Growing up with this name back in the 70's set me apart from other kids.  Sometimes in a good way, and sometimes not.  I had very short hair until I was 20 something and most people probably thought I was a boy but once they realized I was a girl, I think most people liked my unique name.

Today, there are multitudes of studies on how a name shapes a person or a product.  Naming babies was one of my toughest challenges but naming a clothing line was harder.  The name had to show what I wanted to portray.  Take our brand name Majamas.  Many people may not know this but when I invented the first nursing tank top, I intended it to be worn to bed.  My mother said, "You should call it MA-jamas because MOMS will wear it to bed".  The name stuck and now, Majamas is known for making the most comfortable bras in the world for ALL women in addition to a full line of clothing.

Siblings, Shirley and Victor, with Cousin Eddie 

One good turn deserves another so when I had to name our new baby line, I decided it had to have my mom's name in it.  Not only was my mom one of my best friends, but she was also smart, funny, and a woman with a passion for fashion.  With all the baby lines out there, we wanted ours to stand out as unique.  Making it in the U.S. was one way but we wanted the look of it to feel retro. Think bowling shirts for boys and sepia toned prints for girls.  My mother's name, Shirley would be perfect but we had to be sure the world knew it was a baby line for girls and boys.  So we decided to add a common name for boys born in the late 1800's thru the 1940's and that was Victor.  Victor was not only Shirley's brother, but her father was named Victor and my husband's grandfather too.  

Welcome Shirley & Victor to the Raggle, Inc family.  Now Raggle, Inc is the proud owner of Majamas, Nixilu, Eliseo Fashion and Shirley & Victor.   My mom died before she could see Majamas hanging in Nordstrom Department Stores or in Whole Foods Markets but I believe she continues to help me on a daily basis. Last month, the baby line named after her was very well received at markets and picked up by many retailers.  You will soon find Shirley & Victor in stores and on web sites across the country in February, 2015.  Check out our Facebook page, Shirley & Victor and be sure to contact us if you want more information.

Clockwise from Top Left: The Henry Hoodie, The Elsa Top, The Daddio Onesie, and The Peggie Onesie

  



    

Saturday Closings at Majamas Boutique

Dear Majamas Boutique Customers,

We decided to open Majamas Boutique 9 years ago in the Arts District of Oak Park because so many women knocked on our office door looking to purchase Majamas garments directly from us.  Over the years, Majamas Boutique has turned into a store that offers Maternity/Nursing clothing, unique baby clothing, baby toys and more.  Recently we launched our Eliseo Fashion collection that takes all women from sleep to the streets in fashion and comfort. 

Majamas Boutique was intended to be open only during our regular "business" hours and not the typical "retail" hours most other stores are open.  We opened on weekends to try to accommodate the "walk by" traffic but we've found it makes the most sense for us to stick to our original hours.  So, beginning July 5th, Majamas Boutique will no longer be open on Saturdays.  We will remain open during the week, Monday thru Friday, 10am-6pm and we are always open at www.majamasboutique.com

We hope you'll stop in to visit us during our new business hours and look for the launch of our new baby line Shirley & Victor  that will be available in our store and on our site this fall.

Sincerely,

Germaine Caprio and Russell Curry

Raggle, Inc

Proud Owners of Majamas, Nixilu, Eliseo Fashion and Shirley & Victor

The Power of Silence

Last fall was one of the most traumatic times in my family's life.  My daughters, a senior and sophomore in high school were a part of their school's swim team.  Like most swimmers, they woke early for morning workouts, went to school all day and practiced again at night.  Some nights they had swim meets, others they had weight training but regardless of what they did, they were with their "fellow" teammates most of the day. 

When a group of senior girls started picking on my sophomore daughter, my senior daughter took a stand and told these girls to back off.  She asked them to stop tormenting ALL of the underclassmen, including her sister, yet as soon as my senior took a stand, the team became divided.  Both of my girls swam varsity and unfortunately, most of the varsity swimmers decided to isolate and ignore both of my girls, even those my oldest daughter was helping to defend.  Rather than saying anything, they simply stopped including my girls in anything.  Some people would say this is acceptable and not bullying, but think of what happens when a group isolates or ignores an individual.  As teenagers, they stopped getting text messages, stopped getting asked to parties, conversation stopped when they walked into the locker room and worst of all, they stopped getting any support from their team.  The result was devastating.  My youngest daughter with so much potential to place at State, started swimming slower and slower.  Her skin broke out all over her body and she started walking with her shoulders hunched over.  My oldest daughter became self conscious and moody.  She stayed near her younger sister at meets and talked little to anyone else, fearful anything she said would be held against her.  What's worse is the isolation went far beyond the pool and my sophomore found herself eating lunch alone, isolated from others at her table.

Many parents of the girls who isolated my daughters have treated my husband and me in the very same manner.  They have ostracized us and looked at us as if we were the cause of the fallout within the team.  One mother I thought I knew and trusted even said to me, "Your daughter has thrown a wrench in the team causing so many problems."  Her words left me stunned and I felt so betrayed.  It was then I realized just what my girls were going through.  These girls they have known since 4th and 5th grades suddenly

Germaine's daughters, Genevieve & Adelaide

turned on them. A friend sent me this excerpt below describing Dante's Inferno:

"If you've read Dante's "Inferno," you know that his vision of hell involves an inverted cone, with circles narrowing as they approach the bottom of the pit.
I remember being surprised that sins like torture or rape or murder weren't relegated to the very bottom of the pit as the worst sins imaginable. Dante placed the sin of betrayal at the very bottom.
Yes, betrayal is deplorable, but worse than violence like rape? More evil than taking a life?
Every betrayal is a kind of theft, if you think about it. Stolen are the trust and loyalty that should form the bedrock of friendships, marriages, business associations, and even treaties."


It was this betrayal that devastated our family.  My husband had attended the same high school 37 years earlier and many of his friends had daughters on this swim team who actively ignored my girls.  After weeks of being isolated, my senior spoke with the head coach asking for help.  The coach witnessed so many episodes of these girls being unkind to my daughters, yet did nothing to stop it.  My husband and I finally approached the coach asking her to stop the isolation but again, she did nothing so we took it to the administrators of the school.  The principal of the school basically said, "I can't make other girls like your daughters." When we asked if there was an anti-bullying policy in place, the school administration scrambled.  They had no policy to show us and therefore, no consequences to enforce upon these girls or the coach watching it happen.


Today, my daughters are freed from the school.  My senior has happily graduated and is looking forward to making true friends in college.  My sophomore transferred schools and was welcomed into the public school by all her former classmates from middle school.  My husband and I have our true friends standing by us, but some we've known for over 30 years will never be a part of our lives again.  None of them has ever spoken a foul word or written a bad thing about us.  We just get silent glares from the parents when walking into water polo games and swim meets now.  What's so sad is these parents have taught their children that isolation is acceptable and they have created another generation that will continue this tradition of Betrayal.  Now I know why Dante put Betrayal as the worst sin in his nine rings of hell.  It's because there is no way to fight it.  No defense and no fixing it.  Once trust is lost, it's impossible to regain and that's a tough lesson to learn at any age.


Don't ignore it when your child says no one talks with her or you notice she has no friends calling or texting.  Silence and isolation are common forms of bullying and don't be mistaken, this behavior is taught by the parents. Isolation is a form of bullying.  It's wicked and ugly and unkind.  Stop it before it gets out of hand and teach your children to be kind and inclusive.  As Henry James wrote, "There are three important things to do in life.  The first is to be kind.  The second is to be kind and the third is to be kind."

Weathering Change

Germaine's oldest daughter Adelaide in the January snow

This past winter, Chicago was in a deep freeze and overwhelmed with snow. Our Raggle, Inc offices declared two official snow days due to the weather giving me some time to reflect on the past and anticipate the future of the company my husband and I started 15 years ago.

Most people know I started because I was tired of wearing bras to bed after having my first baby.  Little did I know I not only created the first nursing tank top but I created one of the most comfortable bras for all women to wear.    Russ and I went from having a baby to having a business.  We found a niche, filled it and kept our eyes open for ways to keep growing and changing.
Majamas

Eliseo's Vecchio Gown

Our business is based on wholesaling into retail stores like Whole Foods and small boutiques. After the 2008 recession hit, we lost roughly 25% of our small boutiques.  Like any business that loses customers, I tried not to panic and did my best to edit the evening news so I could sleep at night.  Russell and I realized that we had to expand our collection in order to retain and expand our customer base.  So, we created a new collection that didn't cater just to maternity stores and named it Eliseo, after my Italian grandfather from Cuposele', Italy who was also a clothing designer.

Eliseo is made from the same soft, beautiful fabrics used to make Majamas and we do our very best to keep it whimsical, versatile and cute.  Just like the Majamas line, we make everything in the Eliseo collection, from the fabric to the final garment, right here in the United States.  We've never done our manufacturing any other way and as long as Russell and I run the company, we don't plan to ever sew overseas.  Majamas is now a nationally known brand name and we hope that Eliseo will be just as popular in the years to come.

Staying in business is similar to surviving a harsh winter.  There are days when we feel overwhelmed with snow and the day never feels sunny.  The good thing is that just like the weather, the sun does come out and we regain our positive outlook and feel as if nothing can stop us, not even a -13 degree day.  As I watched my daughters playing in the snow, I realized that even the worst weather can be fun and someday, I'll be reflecting again on how fun it was to run a great company like Raggle, Inc. 

To shop Eliseo, visit www.eliseofashion.com

Eliseo's Coperta Poncho

Operate Locally To Save Our Planet

Today it's possible to purchase strawberries grown in Spain, mangos grown in Mayanmar and blueberries grown in New Zealand.  We feel good about buying fruits and vegetables grown all over the world but is it good for us?  The same goes for clothing.  Is it good for us to purchase clothing made in other countries and shipped to the United States even if the garment company making these goods claims to "give back" to the world? 

Two weeks ago I attended the One Earth Film Festival in Oak Park, Illinois.  This amazing festival features films from all over the world that focus on the environment and our impact on it.  I actually spoke on the panel for the film titled, The Economics of Happiness. To sum it up (without my giving it the full justice it deserves), this film covers the importance of retaining our local supply chains and purchasing goods and services that are local.  It discusses how big corporations are destroying the planet by shipping goods all over the world and in most cases, they are even destroying the very communities that produce their goods.  

Be careful shopper because these clothing lines will pull anything out of their hat to get you to feel warm and fuzzy about buying clothes that negatively impact our planet.  Many of these companies use words like "sustainable" and "organic" to describe their clothing.  Some even claim to generously donate to charities or improve the world thru their businesses. So how can any company that produces garments outside the United States, but sells the majority of their products back into it be good for our world?  Are we all really fooled by these good will appearances?  If they don't manufacture their goods within the borders of the major market they sell to, they are not helping our planet or the communities producing the goods for them.

We already know that by sewing in China or any other country besides the United States (if that is their major market), garment lines are heavily contributing to global climate change.  What The Economics of Happiness showed me, is that any garment line that sews outside of its major distribution channel, not only has a higher, negative environmental impact but a much higher negative HUMAN impact. These garment lines add to the destruction of the local essence in the communities where they operate.  The people producing these goods start believing their society is far less valuable than those in the countries they are producing them for.  It creates this global inferiority complex and these villages and small communities lose their own traditions, even their identities over a very short period of time. 

I sound like a broken record but The Economics of Happiness validated my belief in how a responsible garment line or any company for that matter, should work.  A truly responsible garment line who cares about the environment and the diverse populations around the world, produces their goods here in the United States or within the country they sell the majority of their goods to. It's wonderful to donate to worthy causes but if a company doesn't operate locally, all the warm and fuzzy marketing in the world won't help us in the fight against climate change. Most importantly, it won't help us preserve the diverse communities and traditions from which these companies operate, and that my friends is a huge loss for us all.

Shop Local!

The Economics of Happiness:
http://www.greencommunityconnections.org/the-economics-of-happiness/

Worldcrunch:
 http://www.worldcrunch.com/world-affairs/toxic-shipping-containers-may-be-contaminating-your-food-and-clothes/shipping-health-cancer-imports-ikea/c1s10701/#.Uyyr44Xivcs

Fumigants:
 http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/222012/fumigant 

Taking Care of Business, Nicely

Way before I started Majamas, I worked for a large watch company.  I was one of only three women on a sales force of 150 men and I learned very quickly that my female customers weren't always happy to have a woman sales rep calling on them.  These customers were used to flirting with their sales MAN and whenever I walked in with my male boss, they were warm, friendly and gracious.  When I worked with them one on one, they'd turn cold and almost abusive.  

Why some business women work so poorly with others, especially other women, baffles me.  I used to think their attitude came from their predecessors.  You know, the women of the 70s who valiantly worked their way to the top, sacrificing family, friends and more just to break into male dominated businesses.  I completely understand how back in the 70s, a woman had to be tougher and more resilient than the working woman of today.  She had no "Boys Club" to welcome her and no girl friends to lean on.  Thanks to them, we working women feel a lot more comfortable in business.  Unless, of course, our boss, customer or even our coworker is a woman.  I realize I am making a big generalization here and being female myself, I am put in this category but everyone in business has, at sometime or another, had to deal with a mean woman at work.

I had the "honor" of dealing with one just the other day.  This woman isn't a customer but a fellow shop owner.  She has a store on the other side of town that carries similar products to Majamas Boutique and one line in particular we both have carried for years.  Actually, I was the one who recommend she carry this line and stock it for older kids since Majamas Boutique only carries baby clothes up to 4T.  Unfortunately, in typical mean-girl style, she went to the vendor and requested they stop letting us sell their baby line so she could be the only retailer in the area carrying it.  What's worse, is the company listened to her and now, Majamas Boutique won't be able to carry it in our store.  The thing is, we both sold this line equally well and our tiny store did nothing to impact her business.

When I approached this woman about what she'd done, she was defensive and cold.  Here we are, both standing in the basement of her store and all I could think was, "what would two men be doing about this?"  I think they'd go golfing and discuss it over 18 holes, stopping at the 9th to have a beer and agree no harm is done with both of them carrying the same thing.  But women don't handle things that way and part of me regrets not asking her out for a glass of wine to discuss it.  My point is, women don't need to be mean when conducting business just to look strong and capable.  We need to stand up and help each other.  Perhaps if women took care of business nicely, looking out for each other, we'd all reap the rewards and become so happy, we'd lose the need to be mean at all.

New Fall Nursing/ Maternity Items from Nixilu by Majamas®

New Fashions from Nixilu by Majamas® have just arrived!  Find them on www.majamasboutique.com and soon!

All Nixilu and Majamas are Proudly made in the USA.  Show your support for ethically made fashion and shop majamasboutique.com.  Stock up on your nursing essentials, create your registry to email your friends and family, and get free domestic shipping on orders over $75.00!

The Elizabeth Top    #13-1500  MSRP:  $62.00 

The Mimi Dress   #13-1100  MSRP:  $82.00

The Chelone Top  #  13-1502   MSRP:   $62.00

Martha Stewart American Made Voting Starting Soon!

 

Raggle Inc is proud to announce that we  are a Martha Stewart American Made Audience Choice Nominee! 

Voting start Aug 26th!  

View our profile here

Dressed To Kill

Over 1100 people have died after the Bangladesh garment factory collapsed and we all feel horrible about it, but do we feel bad enough to stop supporting the garment lines that continue to make their clothing this way?  Are we willing to stop buying those $5 tank tops in Wal-mart, those $10 t-shirts at Target and all those insanely low priced fashions in Forever 21?  What about the high end designers sewing their lines in these shops like Ralph Lauren, Tommy Hilfiger and Benetton?

Each time I come across a cheap garment hanging in any store, I immediately look at where it was made and do the math in my head.  See, I own a garment line that ONLY manufactures in the United States.  We buy our fabric from the few mills left in the US and all our trims, elastics and buttons from US companies as well.  So, let me break this down for you.  

If you see a garment retailing for $5.00 in a store, the retailer probably paid $2.00 for it.  That means that the fabric used to make the garment, any elastic or trims, shipping the garments, and the sewing of the actual garment must be covered in that $2.00 cost.  For some perspective, it is close to impossible to purchase any fabric made in the US for less than $4.00 a yard.  So tell me, if a wholesaler is receiving $2.00 per garment, what is that wholesaler paying their people who sew it in China, Bangladesh and other countries after they pay for all the other expenses that go into making that one garment?  Most importantly, where does the wholesaler cut his expenses so he can make his profit?

We all must consciously consider these things every time we shop.  Anytime we see that $5.00 tank top or even a $30 dress, we have to do the math in our heads.  We must consider the true cost of labor for each and every "cheap" garment and consider how that wholesaler who sells these to Target, Wal-mart and large designers makes his money.  The truth is, these wholesalers barely pay their sewing operators and they don't even give them safe working conditions. They have literally sacrificed their workers' safety for fashion!  

Doesn't that make that $5.00 tank top feel a lot more expensive?  

Germaine Caprio
Founder/Owner of Majamas, Nixilu and Eliseo Fashion

Parenting vs. Time

Parenting can be monotonous. Oops! Did I just say that out loud? It’s true and anyone who’s had a baby knows it. We’ve all had those days when going to the park and watching your toddler go down the curvy slide one more time is enough to make you scream.

Yesterday I caught the eye of my neighbor as he sat watching his two year old twin boys playing in his backyard. He had that look on his face and I knew he wanted to say he was feeling tired of the routine, but instead, he smiled and commented on how boys are always drawn to the messiest part of the yard. I smiled back recalling all the days I sat watching my girls playing in my yard and wishing for the time when life would get interesting again.

Yes, my babies made me smile and I love them more than life itself but the reality of being the parent of young babies is the days can blend into each other and time can feel as if it completely stops. I think just knowing other parents feel the same way can help you feel better. It’s not that we don’t love our children and want to be with them but it’s one of those things about parenting that people don’t readily admit to. Like everything, sometimes it’s tough to repeat the same routine day after day and with your children, sometimes you don’t see the big changes until they hit a milestone like walking or starting preschool.

Last week I brought my youngest daughter to high school to start her freshman year. I burst into tears as she and her older sister got out of the car. Visions of them as my little babies flashed in front of me and I can’t stop wondering where the time has gone. They are young women now with their own likes and dislikes but I can still see them sitting in the backyard, having a tea party or playing in their kiddie pool.

I used to hate it when people told me to “cherish the baby years” but suddenly, your children are driving and heading off to college. I say suddenly because in hindsight, it really feels like that. Time is fleeting and our children grow up fast. So, enjoy the days when all you have to do is watch them slide down the slide for the hundredth time because soon you won’t see them all day and you’ll wonder how they got from the park to high school so fast. 

Pivoting To A Positive Place

It seems as if all we hear in the news these days is how bad the economy is and how bad EVERYTHING is. It’s difficult to stay positive when we’re bombarded with bad news in the papers and on television.
 
Years ago, I met a therapist at an event who was explaining the power of positive thinking.  It was a sales seminar and part of me planned on tuning her “motivational” speech out until I heard her describe a practice called “pivoting”.  Pivoting is when you feel completely depressed and down and instead of letting your bad mood rule the day, you consciously decide to turn it around and look at everything in a positive light.  For example, I was selling watches at the time and if I didn’t sell the first customer of the day, I always felt the rest of my appointments would fall flat as well.  Of course, I always blamed my customers for why they didn’t buy until I heard this therapist say that our attitudes directly affect every person we come in contact with.  This therapist said that when we “pivot” our bad moods into good ones, we change not only our negative feelings but those of the others around us.

From that time on, I began playing a game with myself to consciously “flip” my outlook on life whenever I started feeling negative.  With this attitude, I have been able to start and keep my company running, overcome some health issues and even help my daughters see the power of positive thought in their daily routines.  My hope is that this “pivoting” therapy will catch on and the media will begin to look at the positives a bleak economy or any negative situation brings.  I know it sounds corny but people come together in rough times and support each other.  People want to thrive, not just survive, and if we could just get the media to report from a positive angle, maybe we could all pivot on those days when that feeling of impending doom looms over us.